Any Good is Good
Maybe it's this time of year or maybe it's the current state of the world, but lately, I find myself feeling immobilized. Everywhere I look, especially on social media, I’m reminded that I’m not doing enough, not being enough, not woke enough, not successful enough, just not enough. When I start to feel like this it makes me want to throw my hands up and quit everything, because God knows, I'm trying to do all I can.
I think this is the general vibe online these days. At any moment, you can have a political party calling you dumb, clueless, or something worse. On the other side, you have people telling you that you’re not enough of a thing to really be on that side. I mean, sometimes it feels like once a day I'm reminded that I'm not enough of a feminist, an environmentalist, an ally. And God knows, I'm trying to do all I can. I want to do good in the world, and every day I try, but it's hard when you're surrounded by criticism.
4 years ago, Chris and I made a transition to a pescatarian (mostly vegetarian, often vegan) diet. We both have a lot of reasons for this choice, and truly, it’s been one of the best decisions of our lives. Our health has improved, we feel like we’re living closer to our conscience, and in general, we’re eating way more greens and veggies than ever before. This decision makes us happier. We also realize that this decision is not for everyone. And we’re okay with that. We don’t have any expectations on others to live the same way we’re living. Our kids will occasionally eat meat from time to time, and we let them choose, because it’s a personal decision about what kind of good you want to do in the world. And there are A LOT of different kinds of good. And doing ANY OF THEM is, well, good.
Our decision to do good in this way, help the environment and do less harm in no way negates your efforts to do good and do less harm. It's not counter-acting. It's compounding! My good + your good (even if its not the same good) = more good in the world. Isn't that great?! Can't we celebrate that?
There was this graphic that was shared on my facebook feed. “Vegans vs vehicles.” If you look at the graphic, the actual study shows that having one less child is miles ahead of any of the other efforts. And going carless and veganism are both solidly good for the environment. My point? It’s not about veganism, it’s that ALL OF THESE CHOICES are good. Do any of them. One of them. All of them. Do them 1 day a week if you can't manage 7. Choose one good thing you can do over and over again and you and the rest of the world will benefit. We don't need to be weighing others good by the measure of our own.
We just made our way through Thanksgiving, a hotly contested holiday. I felt like this year on social media it was a major battlefield between a lot of important issues. But you know what I missed? I missed seeing pictures of families or friends together, their traditions, their happiness. I get it, there are so many atrocities in the world. My heart breaks and is broken for them. And it's good to bring light to those. It is also good to spend time with your family and friends, enjoy those moments, and connect. It’s good to grow in social awareness. It’s good to grow in patience, love, acceptance and understanding. It’s all good.
My neighbor, Lenny, shared a picture of himself, wife and kids all celebrating First Nations Celebration and they looked happy, warm, cozy. That warmed my heart.
It's good to celebrate the fact that for a couple moments in the year families and friends everywhere are sitting around a table, looking at each other, eating together, doing their best to live above and outside of the Facebook world with each other, knowing that they may vastly disagree on a lot of topics? Bringing light to atrocities is good. Bringing light to the people around you through kindness and authentic love is also good. Allowing people the space for happiness in your network is also good. It's ALL good.
I’ve been thinking about social media and how it’s impacted so many fibers of our lives. There’s a person in my greater extended family that literally can’t look at me in the face or speak to me. And you know what, I love her. And if she’d speak to me, she’d hear that. She’d feel that. I know many of you have similar stories. I wrote a song about it - you can see a live version here!
I know in my life the only thing that has ever been enough of an impetus for me to change has been love. No amount of shaming, no arguing, no rage has ever made me change my mind.
I am so grateful that along the way many people, people different than me, people with other stories and background and ethnicities than me, people with different religious backgrounds and belief systems loved me. They let me spurt out ridiculous ideology and beliefs at them, thinking I was being loving and helpful. Through the course of our relationship, they taught me, in love, that some of these beliefs I held were hurtful and incorrect. Love has changed me and is changing me.
One of my favorite artists in town, Frankie Simone, calls herself (and all of us) “Love Warriors.” (check her music vid on the link). She’s right. We are. It’s the only battle that matters, because it’s the only one that will make one iota of difference in the world.
So, I am rejecting the idea of society telling me that I'm not good enough. Instead, I choose to spend my time acting on the good that I feel compelled to do. And I'll do it and let it inspire me to do more good, in ways that feel authentic to me and help me live close to my conscience. I hope you do the same. See ya out there!
P.S. New album coming on Feb 1! Can't wait to share with you!